My Honest Poem by Rudy Francisco
I was born on July 27th.
That makes me a Leo. I don’t really
know what that means.
Iʼm 5ʼ6”
I weigh 145 lbs.
I donʼt know how to swim
And Iʼm a sucker for a girl with a nice smile and clean sneakers.
Iʼm still learning how to whisper.
Iʼm often loud in places where I should be quiet
Iʼm often quiet in places where I should be loud.
I was born feet first and Iʼve been backwards ever since.
I like ginger ale… a lot.
Iʼve been told that I give really bad hugs.
People say it feels like Iʼm trying to escape.
Sometimes it’s because I am.
Secretly, I get really nervous
Every time someone gets close enough to hear me breathe.
I have this odd fascination with things like sand castles and ice sculptures
I assume itʼs because I usually find myself dedicating time to things that will only
last a few moments. It’s also why I tend to fall in love with women who will never love me back.
I know that sounds crazy but itʼs easier than it seems
And to be honest I think itʼs safer that way
You see relationships they often remind that Iʼm not afraid of heights or falling
But I am scared of what’s going to happen the moment
That my body hits the ground. Iʼm clumsy.
Yesterday I tripped over my self-esteem
Landed on my pride and it shattered like an iPhone with a broken face
Now I canʼt even tell whoʼs trying to give me a compliment.
Iʼve never been in the military but I have this purple heart.
I got it from beating myself up over things I canʼt fix.
I know this sounds weird but sometimes I wonder what my bed sheets say about me
when Iʼm not around. I wonder what the curtains would do if they found out about all
the things Iʼve done behind their backs.
I’ve got a hamper thatʼs over flowing with really really loud mistakes
And a grave yard in my closet.
Iʼm afraid that if I let you see my skeletons
Youʼd grind my bones into powder and get high on my fault lines.
Hi, my name is Rudy.
I enjoy frozen yogurt, people watching, and laughing for absolutely no reason at all.
But I donʼt allow myself to cry as often as I need to.
I have solar power confidence.
I have a battery operated smile.
My hobbies include:
Editing my life story,
Hiding behind metaphors,
And trying to convince my shadow
That Iʼm someone worth following.
I donʼt know much, but I do know this:
I know heaven is full of music.
I know God listens to my heartbeat on his iPod.
It reminds him
that we still got work to do.
(2012)
My favorite poem is "My Honest Poem" by Rudy Francisco (my favorite spoken word poet). "My Honest Poem" is a raw reflection of what it feels like to be in the process of becoming who you are and being ok with the idea that you are a work in progress. It speaks to the fear of showing our true selves to others in case they might pass judgment on us and about our deep desire to feel seen by others as someone worthy. I love it because so many people can relate to this particular experience of being human.
Kristen Dedmon Honors Literature and Composition I