When I moved from Illinois to California at nine-years old, I didn’t have the convenience of a phone to text my close friend in Chicago. With 2,000 miles separating us, handwritten letters were our only way to communicate.

Eventually, sending and receiving letters became a ritual. Every other week, I’d grab the mailbox keys and search for a letter with my name. Then, I would hurry home and rip open the envelope, excited to read a five-page missive of updates, starting with her answers to the questions in my previous letter and eventually reaching miscellaneous snippets about which teachers she hated, how she was performing in band, and what she wanted to know about my life.

Then I’d settle at the kitchen counter with my stationery box, select a letter and envelope from my paper collection, and begin a reply with “Dear Jaslene.” 

But four years after we started exchanging letters, we stopped, partly because we were too busy preparing for high school, but mostly because we now had cell phones and could enjoy the immediacy of texting. 

Abandoning handwritten letters in favor of texting was not unique to me and Jaslene. Since the advent of texting (technically, Short Message Service [SMS]) in the 1990s, people worldwide have replaced the more laborious process of letter-writing with emojis and abbreviations.

Transcribing thoughts in legible script, tucking the letter into an envelope, then transporting it to a mailbox is, to some, tedious and inefficient. But it’s that labor and care that’s exactly why we should write letters – the act shows effort, love, and respect for its recipient.

To some teens, letters might seem reserved for love confessions, like those in the 2014 young adult novel To All The Boys I’ve Loved Before and its ensuing adaptations on Netflix.

But letters have many purposes, including short “thank you” notes, postcards from travel, or keeping in touch with old friends who have moved away.

The beauty of writing letters, ultimately, is that letter-writing requires intentionality. 

While texting clearly has its benefits – it’s immediate, it’s low-commitment, and emojis are fun – it doesn’t convey real emotion. For instance, when my friends share a TikTok or Instagram Reel, it sometimes feels like a chore to reply — instead of thinking of something clever to say in response, I double-tap the message to send a heart and the “conversation” dies there. It’s hard to talk about anything deep with such impersonal responses.

But with handwriting, there’s personality in each letter, in every word. We write sentences meticulously, mindful of our readers’ time and avoiding ambiguities that might be misinterpreted. Careful spacing of letters and the arranging of words make writing more intimate in comparison to dozens of quickly written texts.

And embellishing the envelope can turn otherwise mundane mail into a keepsake that excites the reader before they even open the letter. 

Beyond strengthening relationships, writing letters also has long-term benefits. Writing by hand improves memory, verbal and fine motor skills, and also allows one to practice structuring sentences, grammar, and spelling.

Handwritten letters also create a sense of permanence. When writing with a pen, we can’t completely delete what we wrote like we can in Google Docs or Snapchat messages. A letter is a tangible exhibition of a person’s thoughts about a specific memory, a tangible time capsule.

So if you’re among the 37% of Americans who haven’t written a personal letter or note to a loved one in five or more years, instead of typing “wyd” into your phone, consider picking up a pen and composing thoughtful notes to the people you care about. They’ll appreciate the effort (and might surprise you with a letter in return).